Custom «Peer Review» Essay Paper Sample

The narration has a clear flow of the ideas. The ideas are presented logically and clearly. This is the most recommendable aspect of this paper. The narration has clearly brought out the idea of racism in the American students.

This narration has applied metaphors very well to drive the message home. For instance, the phrase that 'California is a melting pot of different cultures has helped in construction of a clear picture of the situation. Phrases like 'Getting along with American students; they started to open their mind' are particularly vivid. Such phrases are constructed in a way that they brings the message home in an intended way.

In general, the ideas in the paper are presented very clearly. The ideas are connected in a logical way. There is feasible connection of the ideas presented.

The writer has provided a paragraph that reflects the content of the narration. However, this paragraph is too long. There is a need to summarize the content of the narration in few words. A title or an opening paragraph should provide the reader with what is contained in the body. It should capture the attention of the reader.

The nagging question for the narrative can be 'What was the reaction of teachers with respect to the issue of racism'.

The narration has a poor detail and portrayal of the characters and settings in the development of themes. There is a need to improve on this area by giving detailed portrayal of the characters.

The order and pacing of the scenes and connections is good. However, there is a need to expand the description of various scenes to bring out the clear picture of the described situation.

The writer has included some reflection on an essay from this unit. He has also incorporated a few quotes. The writer has linked the theme of racism in a very good way. However, he may try to relate other themes in the essay.